Sometimes, life is really hard. I feel like I just want to crawl into my bed and literally lay there all day long. My weeks have been really dragging lately since announcing to the world that I will start my new job in a few weeks. Every day, it gets harder and harder to get through the mind numbingly boring world of data entry. I honestly believe that it is a place where the grumpiest, saddest people go to live out their lives. Some of my coworkers are so difficult to get a long with--and I consider myself a people person! With that said, I am so happy to be moving in another direction in the coming weeks.

Segway into a different topic...

Friendship is strange & wonderful.

I have some wonderful, amazing friends. I am extremely blessed to have best friends that live 10 miles away and best friends who will make the 2,000 journey to visit me. I am truly lucky to have these people in my life. I miss the far away ones daily.

Third topic...

Marriage is another strange, strange thing. There are days when I feel like it is so hard to live with another person. I never have enough space or alone time. I can't always do what I want to do. I have to think about another person before buying things, making plans and even cooking dinner. But then...then I think about the fact that all my worries, fears, and concerns can be shared with my spouse. I get so much strength from Matt. He helps me through so much. He protects me when I am feeling sad or alone. Having him beside me makes me life so much better. I love him so, so much.

Lastly...

God is beautiful. The way he laces everything together is absolutely amazing. I love that no matter what, I can count on Him to be there. I am never alone, because He is always with me. I feel such comfort in knowing that God has Plan A for my life, and although I do worry about my day-to-day decisions, I also know that God is protecting me.

Overall, I am feeling very thankful for everything in my life right now. Things are progressing and I am feeling more and more like my life is taking shape. It's an amazing feeling.

Wonderful, Beautiful, Crazy Life

"Life is short."

That's a funny thing to say. Yet, we all say it. And mean it. It does seem short, doesn't it? After 26 years, I am truly beginning to understand the concept. My life is at a very strange stage. It seems as though the last ten years have flown by. Just today, I made a comment that when I say something occurred when I was sixteen, that was actually ten years ago. It just feels so odd that it was a decade ago that I started driving, dating and was more than halfway through high school. It's hard to fathom it, as I feel like I was in college at Ohio State only a few days ago.

However, there are some aspects of my life that still seem to take a very long time. For instance, I feel like I am slooooowly getting to a "real job". When I was younger, age 26 looked very different. Honestly, when I was sixteen, I pictured my current age like this:

Married. A baby. Working a great job. Living in a nice house, that I owned, of course. Pretty much the upper middle class lifestyle.

Yeah. That's no quite where I'm at.

Sure, I'm married, but that is where the similarities end. While I did marry a wonderful guy, and I am quite happy, there are certainlly aspects of my life that are not what I expected. I definitely didn't picture living with two other people when I got married. Nor did I imagine the debt. Oh, also I didn't think I'd be living in Arizona. I certainly didn't think I would be childless, and furthermore, I didn't think I would be aiming more toward a two year plan or so for having kids. I really figured that life was a giant cookie cutter, I guess.

And yet. I am so happy. I really am. I have made some really amazing friends in the last year. I have been so, so blessed. Really. There are people in my life who are just perfect for the place in life that I'm currently at. I have found an amazing church, and even though we have gone through some changes in the short time I've attended, I feel so at home. The people there are really and truly the greatest people I could ask for in a church community. I need that. God has been so, so good to me. I know that even when I am feeling low, He is there and He is guiding me. I know for sure that this is Plan A. I think that is what really keeps me going, knowing that God has Plan A for my life. This life is not a punishment or a secondary plan. This great life is mine, and I am embracing it with everything I've got.

I don't know how I went from thinking about the "life is short" phrase to all of this. I guess, to round it out, I would say, yes, life is short. But it is so much more than that. It is a really interesting, crazy, wonderful, beautiful journey. There are ups and downs, but that is the interesting part. We hate to admit it, but the rough patches are a really integral part of the journey. They are a huge part of what makes us who we are, and for that I am very grateful.

To sum all this rambling up, I would just like to say that I am happy to be on this journey. Long or short, difficult or easy, life is a road we all have to take. I'm choosing to embrace it with all I've got.

If you are my friend on Facebook, please spare me from pictures of your kid doing the following:

Crying
Eating
Playing in food
Being ill
In a diaper
Sitting on the toilet
Having a tantrum
Picking his/her nose

Thanks in advance!

So many tweets and status updates about people losing faith in the country, "stupid idiots" on both sides, and all the other political garbage out there. If you are this upset, and have put all of your reliance, time and energy on/in the government or political leaders in charge, you should take a good hard look at what you are putting your high expectations in in the first place. Imperfect policies and people will always let you down and never satisfy you. God is literally the only one who can do that for you. So before you feel depressed or like the world is falling down around you, look to God, because I unlike politicians, governments and fellow Americans, He will not let you down.

Alone time...yeah, that never happens.

In the last year, I've transitioned from living with one roommate, to living by myself, to living with my parents & brother, to living with my husband and two other guys. The shortest of those arrangements was me living alone. During that time, I really enjoyed having time to write, relax & just generally be by myself. Now, I feel like I am on someone else's schedule all the time. For example, I'm being summoned to bed as I type...so much for blogging!

What is God's plan for my life?

I have spent a lot of time lately trying to figure that out. I have been paying attention more lately. I have talents, most of which it has taken my the whole 25 years of my life to realize. I am learning that I love people so much. I have a really soft spot in my heart for struggling people. By struggling people, I really mean people who look just like me. People who live an average American life, yet are going through changes and challenges like life transitions, addictions, love life problems, etc. my heart goes out to these people because I can see myself in them. I can feel their pain, even if I don't personally share the same struggles. I just want so badly to provide love, help and understanding to these people. My heart aches for them, and I feel called to help them in some way.

I am by no means perfect. I know this, and so does God. I also know that it doesn't matter. That doesn't stop me from trying to live life according to God's plan for me. It also doesn't stop me from reaching out to other and lending a helping hand. Actually, I feel like my imperfections and past troubles have given me the tools to help others.

Thank you God for showing me that I do have a purpose. I aiterating to live it every day.

My official excuse? My laptop broke.

Really though? I just haven't committed. And I miss it. Reading about my life from even six months ago makes me sad that I haven't journaled or blogged in so long. And there have been so many things to write about. Oh so many,

The big news? Matt and I got married! Seriously, wow. It's been a month now, and it is honestly incredible. The months leading up to our wedding for fun, stressful, exciting and infuriating at times. I won't lie and say it was smooth sailing the whole way through. We made it tot he other side though, and today, on our one month anniversary, I have to say that I am overjoyed with our relationship. God has blessed me with finding another person to share my life with. I'm so happy I found him so early in life. I'm absolutely thrilled to spend the rest of my life with this man.

Marriage has brought a lot of challenges. Heck, life has brought a lot of challenges this year. A whirlwhind of change has occurred in my life, and I think it s for the better. I'm in love, I'm happy, I'm making really great friends, and i know my relationship with God is getting stronger every day. I feel that my future looks pretty bright.

I still haven't found a professional career yet, but I'm okay with it. Of course, I want to make more money and feel more satisfied at work, but I know that the right opportunity will come along. Right now, I am enjoying the ride. Life is such a beautiful journey, and I'm doing my best to enjoy it.

I have so much more to write about, but I think my husband just got home and I want to go wish him a happy one month anniversary. I promise I will try to write more soon.